Tamed and Taught: Why Society Fears Wild Pleasure
Tamed and Taught: Why Society Fears Wild Pleasure
Blog Article
Wild pleasure—raw, instinctive, unapologetic—has always made society uncomfortable. Not because it is dangerous in itself, but because it is untamed. It doesn’t ask for permission. It doesn’t wait to be made polite. It threatens the systems that depend on control.
From early on, we’re taught to filter our joy, our longing, and our sensuality through the lens of acceptability. Be desirable, but not too sexual. Express yourself, but not too loudly. Want, but not for yourself. These messages are especially loud for women, queer people, and anyone whose pleasure doesn’t fit within traditional molds.
Why this fear of wildness?
Because wild pleasure is power. It is self-sourced, unshaped by guilt or performance. It doesn’t exist to please, to conform, or to prove worth. It belongs to the person who feels it—and that, in a world built on obedience, is revolutionary.
Tamed pleasure is manageable. It fits neatly into roles: the good wife, the casual hookup, the erotic but controlled fantasy. Wild pleasure, however, resists roles. It is messy, embodied, emotional, spiritual. It can’t be commodified as easily. It asks us to feel fully, not just perform.
But when we disconnect from our wildness, we also disconnect from the parts of ourselves that are alive, intuitive, and free. We begin to navigate sex and intimacy from a place of performance or fear—never fully letting go, never fully arriving.
Reclaiming wild pleasure means remembering the body before it was taught to shrink. It means asking what we actually want, not what we think we’re supposed to want. It means unlearning the rules of “good” sex and listening instead to sensation, slowness, fire, breath.
To feel pleasure—untamed, unedited, unapologetic—is to return to ourselves. It is not the opposite of safety, but the foundation of truth. And maybe that’s what society fears the most: people who are free not because they were allowed to be—but because they claimed it anyway.
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